Song session guidelines

Sessions sometimes have complicated social dynamics that can be tricky to navigate. At a great session, everyone has fun; everyone got to sing as much as they wanted, and doesn’t feel anyone else hogged the floor, or that they were shut down or shut out.

Really, the only rule is to be considerate. However, it can sometimes be difficult to know what’s considerate. These are guidelines that I’ve observed can result in a good session when followed, and a less-good session when not. They are my opinion, but I welcome your comments.

1. Learn the culture. Some sessions are “song circles,” and everyone takes turns (or passes); others are more free-for-all, and others have a more active leader calling on people. Personally, I prefer the free-for-all, but sometimes find myself turning into the leader if things are slowing down. At some sessions, anything and everything goes; at others, only songs from Rise Up Singing are appropriate. Get a feel for the session, or just ask.
2. Take turns. If there is anyone else at the session who has led fewer songs than you, encourage them to take a turn. (Not too hard; if they don’t want to, that’s fine, too.) Some people are a little shy, or need a moment to collect themselves to sing, and if others are jumping in to every silence, they may give up. If two people start to sing at the same time, try to defer to the one who has sung less or less recently.
3. Follow the leader. Pay attention to the person leading the song. Especially with traditional song, there may be many very similar variants, and it is important to sing the same song that the leader is, at the same tempo. You may be used to a faster or slower version, or slightly different words; appreciate the differences that traditional song can take on. Corollary: as the leader, be clear about the tempo and melody so that the other singers can follow you.
4. Know your song. While some purists insist on only memorized songs, a reminder sheet can be of great assistance. However, reading the lyrics can also lead to singing into the paper (or smartphone), or stumbling over awkward scansion. Similarly, if you’re unsure of the melody of the song you’re leading, it will be difficult for the rest of the singers to follow it. Get comfortable with a new song before debuting it.
5. Choruses preferred. People come to song sessions to sing with other people. An occasional solo showcase is nice, especially a song that may be new to most of the people there, but most of the songs should have a chance for people to sing along. If your song has no chorus, but you want people to sing along, explicitly invite them to do so; if the song is not well-known, consider handing out lyrics sheets.
6. No repeats, please. Try not to lead a song someone else has already led that session. It can lead to an appearance of one-upping, even when not intended.
7. Accompaniment by request. As an instrumentalist (including percussionists), only accompany the singer if they invite you, or if they are playing an instrument themselves. It can be distracting for a singer to have an instrumentalist trying to find the key, or to feel locked into a tempo by a drum. Corollary: as the leader, if you would like accompaniment, be sure to say so.

Again, these are just guidelines, and are my opinion and observation, possibly poorly-worded. I welcome your comments and observations.